In our fast paced society, we are bombarded with a multitude of different activities, events, and choices that all beg for our attention and time. Our culture encourages us to take the smorgasbord approach, sampling every philosophy, activity, and desire until we are full. Culture prescribes how we should spend our time and direct our focus. In a world where everything is available on a 24/7 cycle, it can become difficult to set the right priority for our families. There are so many demands for our time and attention.
Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. (Hebrews 12:1)
Here is the concept: healthy priorities lead to a healthy and strong family. Ultimately, we have to know the truth about what comes first, and cast this vision in our families. Without the right priorities, the family may develop significant problems. When this dynamic becomes chronic, it can lead to disorder. Marital problems, discouragement, worry, childhood behavioral issues, even emotional disorders, can be significantly influenced by the priorities that we allow to operate in our lives. Having clear priorities will contribute to a healthy lifestyle.
Here is a simple, but powerful exercise to help your family identify its natural priorities. Cut and paste the following exercise onto a separate sheet of paper and give a copy to each family member. Commit to being brutally honest about how you manage time in the following categories. Then discuss the results.
Priorities Inventory
On average, how many hours do you spend each day doing the following?
___ Sleep
___ Work
___ Housework
___ Taking care of needs of your children
___ Preparing meals, eating, and cleaning up
___ Hobbies
___ Using the computer (other than work)
___ Entertainment (television, music, movies)
___ Shopping
___ Doing schoolwork
___ Going to church
___ Reading the Bible and praying
___ Attending social events and meetings
___ Other: ___________________________
___ Total
“Most people today are either too busy–or not busy enough. Either our schedules are so hectic we can’t get everything done, or else we are bored and restless, constantly looking for something to amuse us. The Bible, however, tells us that both extremes are wrong.” Billy Graham
Considering the priority inventory above, what items are getting the most attention? What is the reality about how your family sets priorities? Now, contemplate the following guidelines for managing time in the family:
1. See each day as a gift from God.
Psalm 31:15 says, “My times are in Your hand…”
2. Commit you time to God.
Psalm 90:12 says, “The righteous man will flourish like the palm tree, He will grow like a cedar in Lebanon”
3. Set aside time for God and others.
4. Take time for your own needs.
Cedar of Lebanon
Spiritual strength is central to good emotional health. Many times, the problems that occur in our families will stem from our spiritual vulnerability. This week, consider taking your families schedule off of autopilot. Don’t let the world direct your focus. Put your life focus in God’s hands.
Pray about the results of your priority inventory, and then consider the next right steps. Have faith in Jesus Christ. Let His priorities take the lead in your family. He is the wonderful counselor, and can lead your family to re-ordering their lives. The result – miraculous fulfillment, strength and growth.
May God bless you this weekend,
Richard Hoffman Ph.D.
Clinical Director
Christian Counseling Associates of Western PA
Website: Christiancounselingwpa.com
