Have you ever thought about your family history? How many times have you realized (maybe after a big argument with your spouse), that you are carrying bad habits from the past? Upon further reflection, it is easy to notice how this habit is very similar to something you saw your mom or dad do while you were growing up. Hey, we don’t want to get down on our family here, but let’s get honest. Many of us have a range of experiences in our upbringing. The spectrum of childhood memories range from great to unfortunate. For some of us, the memories can be quite painful. We have learned both positive and negative lessons from our upbringing. These profound lessons, very subtly, create patterns of behavior in our everyday lives.
Have you every noticed that even your physical mannerisms, such as hand gestures, the way you walk, or the certain phrases, sayings, or slogans you use mimic your parents? How about the way we arrive home from work, or how we spend our spare time with the family? Have you ever found yourself falling into the same specific bad habits, just like the ones you watched in your childhood home? Many of our behaviors can be traced back to the examples set by your childhood experience.
The family tip for this week: reflect on your family history. How is history repeating itself in your present household? What are the key values, beliefs, characteristics, traits and behaviors that your parents modeled during your upbringing? What are the noble patterns that you need to pass on to your children? Which are the harmful patterns that are clearly leftover from the past? This type of reflection is designed to raise your awareness of strengths and weaknesses in your upbringing. When we focus on history, we can become intentional. It’s like taking yourself off of “autopilot.”
Create a New History
Proverbs 6:20 says, “My son, observe the commandment of your father and do not forsake the teaching of your mother.” From this day forward, let’s focus on discovering what God’s will is for our family. What values, beliefs, characteristics, traits and behaviours does He call us to teach in the family circle? If you were fortunate enough to be raised in a Christ-centered home, what were the God-honoring instructions and teachings of your parents? These teachings need to be honored as a timeless legacy. If you did not come from a faith-based home, search for family lessons that were reflections of god’s truth and grace. Ultimately, we need to celebrate these memories and make a commitment to carry them forward.
Goal #1 – Identify 7 specific God-honoring values that were taught in your childhood.
What new values need to be established in the life of your family? What are the “commandments” or “teachings” that you will want your family to inherit and remember years from now?
Part of trusting in God is searching for His commandments and teachings that apply directly to your family. This week, go to the Bible and look for specific values, beliefs, characteristics, traits and behaviors that need to be demonstrated in the future.
Goal #2 – Identify 7 new values that can be a Christ-like influence in your family. Write these goals in a journal to make them a permanent focus. Pray daily about how God may lead you to incorporate these new patterns into home relationships.
Imagine as you do this, that you are removing your autopilot and humbly inviting God to be the pilot and the head of your family.
When Jesus Christ is leading our families into the future, we can rest in the fact that a great history is being formed that will be celebrated for generations to come.
